Forsaken Read online

  I climbed in the truck and started it up, looking up at the hospital. Damn Brendan. He had nearly gotten himself killed while I was sleeping with the enemy.

  Well sleeping wasn’t the correct term to us. Fucking was more like it, and Faye really wasn’t the enemy. She had been screwed over by attempting to reconnect with her father at the worst time really. I saw her as another pawn in Hector’s cruel game of life.

  So, what the hell was I going to do with her? I had left her with a few guys, leaving before she could see how fucking tore up I was about Brendan and his injuries. My brothers were everything to me, but after those few hours with the real Faye I was starting to think that maybe there was more to life. Maybe I was understanding why my brothers had given up their freedom and taken a second chance on some sort of future.

  I hadn’t thought about it since the night Sarah had left me standing in that field.

  I let out a laugh suddenly, shaking my head. Faye wasn’t my future. There was no fucking way I could even think about being related to the man that had nearly slaughtered my brother. Attraction or no attraction, Faye was a prisoner.

  But as soon as I thought it, I couldn’t bring myself to believe it fully. Fucking hell. When had this all become so damn complicated?

  And what was I going to do with her?

  Chapter 13

  Faye

  I nibbled on a nail as I watched the door, hoping that Jaxon would walk in at any moment and tell me that Brendan was still alive, that he was going to be just fine. My stomach was in knots as to what he must be feeling, how hopeless he was on what to do.

  And how much he hated me.

  I shifted my feet underneath me and glared at the guard that was watching my every move. Jaxon had sent in three goons to watch me, as if I was still planning on running back to my father. Honestly, I was torn at what to do. It was hard to believe that the man I wanted to connect with had nearly killed another man in cold blood, all because of this stupid biker war over who had the bigger cock.

  I was sick of it.

  The door opened, and Jaxon came in, soaking wet.

  “Thanks,” he muttered, motioning for the other guys to get out.

  They did without a word and he shut the door, briefly leaning against it. I climbed off the couch and grabbed a blanket, walking over to him.

  “Here. You will get sick if you don’t get warm.”

  He took it wordlessly, not even sparing me a glance as he walked over to the fireplace, his clothes starting to steam in the warm cabin. I bit my lip, unsure of what to say or do. It was clear that he was upset, but if I tried to comfort him, would he accept it?

  I couldn’t stand the rejection, not from him.

  “How is he?”

  “He’s alive,” came the abrupt reply, one arm resting on the fireplace as he stared into the fire. “Laura is pissed off, and I can’t fucking think straight.”

  “Jaxon, I…” I started, unable to finish.

  What could I say? It had been my own flesh and blood that had caused this hurt.

  “Go to bed, Faye,” he finally said, weariness in his voice. “I need to think.”

  I dropped my gaze, feeling the sudden rush of tears that stubbornly attempted to surface. I had gotten too involved.

  And now I was going to have my heart broken.

  **

  Two Weeks Later

  I stared at the toilet bowl numbly, wincing as my stomach flipped over once again. I was never sick, but the last three days I had thrown up more than I cared to count. Sitting back on my heels, I pressed my hand to my head and felt for a fever, not finding a lick of warmth on my skin. In the afternoons I felt fine, hungry but fine.

  Then it hit me.

  No.

  I couldn’t be.

  My mouth hung open as I fell against the tub, staring at the toilet. I mean, it was possible I guess. Though Jaxon and I had barely said two words to each other in the last two weeks, our bodies had done the talking. Every day Jaxon went out to meet with the club, leaving bodyguards behind to watch me mope around the cabin until he returned. I was like the damn puppy in the window when their owner came home. Except my owner didn’t even glance in my direction until it was time to have sex.

  Then and only then, did he show me any affection, giving my body more love and caresses that left me breathless.

  And I knew every inch of his body in return. I knew every crevice, every dimple and every trace of that tattoo. He allowed me to worship his body, and when he finally slid into me I felt the slightest bit of warmth from him. Some nights it was a furious coupling that would leave us gasping for breath, while others we took our time, loving each other until I thought that maybe the morning would be different.

  But he never stayed, not even once, and now it looked as if our fun was coming to an end.

  Rubbing my forehead, I thought back to all of those times where I hadn’t asked for a condom and he hadn’t asked me about pills. Hell, I couldn’t remember the last time I took my pills.

  I was pregnant.

  My breath stuttered in my throat as I gently touched my still flat stomach, thinking about the baby that could be potentially growing there. Mine and Jaxon’s baby.

  Oh my God!

  What was I going to do? I couldn’t tell him, not now. Brendan had made some improvement but was still in a drug-induced coma, so his wounds could heal. That I had found out from overhearing a conversation Jaxon was having, apparently with his other brother on the phone.

  And the war… I couldn’t let my father know either. He might try to use it against Jaxon and his family.

  This could not be happening.

  I pulled myself off the floor and looked in the mirror, seeing the same freckle-faced girl that I always saw. I hadn’t imagined ever having kids, not sure if I was motherly enough to handle raising another human being.

  Right now, though, I couldn’t think of anything else. What would they look like? I hoped they had Jaxon’s eyes and my freckles. A tremble of laughter raced through me, and I shook my head. I was pregnant. I was going to have a baby. There were all kinds of wrong with that thought, but it was completely true.

  Well pending a test of course.

  Would Jaxon change once he found out? Did I want him to find out? Every day that I was stuck in that cabin I felt like I was a prisoner. Sure, at night he loved my body and gave me everything a girl could hope for, but there was nothing beyond that.

  And now I doubted it would change with my little news. Clearly, I wasn’t relationship material for him, and he could be boning other girls when he left the bed every night. I didn’t know. I had no idea where he went.

  Nor did I have any claim on him.

  I rubbed a hand over my face, wiping away any signs that would give away my newly found secret. I had to get out of this. I had to see what Jaxon truly thought of me.

  And I had to protect this baby.

  Chapter 14

  Jaxon

  I stared down at the woman lying in the bed, my heart racing in my chest. I had been later than normal tonight, attempting to solve a dispute between club members, but the whole time all I could think about was Faye waiting on me here, naked in this bed we shared every night for a few hours.

  I should be ashamed at what I was doing. Actually, I felt like the lowest form of asshole there was by giving her nothing but a good fuck every night. I didn’t know what to say to her, nor did I know what to do with her.

  She was my prisoner, yet she assaulted my mind and heart on a daily basis, her wounded eyes searing into my damn heart every time I walked away. She was all I could think about.

  Well that and a way to get her away from me.

  Silently, I stripped off my clothing and climbed in beside her, hesitating to even wake her up. Part of me wanted to just lay here beside her, feel her warm body wrapped up beside me, and breathe.

  But if I did that, she would think far more into this, and I coul
dn’t fucking handle that right now. It was best that I kept this distance going until I could get the club straightened out and decide what to do with Hector. So far, the bastard had escaped to parts unknown, but the guys had made it known on the street that I was wanting a meeting with him.

  But I wasn’t willing to use Faye to do it. That had been a conversation amongst some of the other bikers, that I should flaunt his daughter under his nose and demand that he meets me or I kill her.

  The thought sickened me.

  Faye moved suddenly, and I pulled myself back inside, schooling my emotions as she opened her eyes.

  “You’re home.”

  Home. That was not what this was. I covered her body with mine quickly before I could digest that word, pressing my lips to hers. I wanted to forget. I wanted to not feel these conflicting emotions about her, about the club, about anything.

  I wanted to forget.

  She pulled me closer, and I sighed inwardly, relieved that she wouldn’t press the issue. She never did, allowing me to take her every night without fail.

  Some nights I felt like an asshole.

  I roughly ran a hand down her body like she liked, burying a finger inside her and feeling her gasp under my lips, her core already wet and ready for me. My cock jumped to attention as I brought her to her first orgasm with just a flick of my finger in the right area, surprised that I knew so much about her body. Tearing my lips from hers, I nibbled on her neck as she climaxed around my finger, tracing my tongue to her collarbone and tasting the sweet saltiness of her skin.

  I knew every inch of her body as she did mine. On the sex aspect, we were like an old married couple.

  “Jaxon,” she breathed, clutching my upper arms. “Please.”

  I knew what she wanted. Poising over her, I looked down at her lovely face, seeing the familiar heat in her eyes as she slid a hand up my arm to cup my cheek. Usually I swatted her hand away, but tonight… well, it just felt right.

  “Tell me what you want,” I said roughly, leaning into her touch.

  Her lips parted.

  “I want you inside me.”

  I didn’t let her go any further, pushing into her tight wetness. She gasped and arched against me, but I kept pushing until I was buried inside Faye, my breathing heavy. Already I could have exploded inside her.

  She clawed at my shoulders, and I moved, giving her the second orgasm of her night. It was always like this, the way she threw her head back when she was about to scream, the pulse that fluttered at her throat wildly, begging for me to trace it with my tongue.

  A man could die like this.

  With a grunt, I started a slow and steady pace, pulling her with me with every thrust. I knew once this was over, I would be leaving her again, to spend my night sitting in my truck, cursing everything I had just done. All I was doing was delaying the inevitable, but I didn’t want to give her up.

  Not yet.

  She moaned, and I gritted my teeth as she tightened around me, feeling the familiar pressure of my own release starting to build. A minute later, I let go, gripping her hips tightly as she took it all. For one suspended moment in time, all was right with the world. I had a gorgeous woman under me and a sated body that wanted nothing more than to sleep in this bed.

  But I couldn’t.

  With a grunt, I pulled out and stood, grabbing at my clothes angrily.

  “Don’t go, Jaxon.”

  I froze, looking back at her.

  “What?”

  She bit her lip, and I saw emotion flood her face, emotion that tugged at my dark soul.

  “I-I want you to stay. Please.”

  I laughed harshly.

  “Why? Did you like it that much?”

  Her cheeks flooded, but I knew it wasn’t from my words. She was fucking embarrassed.

  “I-I just thought.”

  I grabbed up my clothes, thrusting my legs into my jeans.

  “You thought wrong, Faye. This isn’t some lovey-dovey bed sex. You are a prisoner.”

  As soon as the words left me, I wanted to push them back into my damn mouth. Her expression changed, and for a moment I thought she was going to cry.

  Fuck. Why did I have to say that?

  “Get out.”

  It wasn’t as much that she was trying to throw me out of my own damn cabin that bothered me the most; it was the emotion in her voice, that I had hurt her with my words. I was being unreasonably mean for no reason at all.

  “Faye.”

  I said get out!” she yelled, grabbing the sheet and hiding her body.

  I looked at her and felt that same tightness in my chest that I felt every night I walked out of this bedroom. Was she just a prisoner or something else?

  Well I wasn’t going to find out tonight.

  “I’m sorry,” I forced out, walking out of the room before I could say anything else fucking stupid. I didn’t know what to do really, but I wasn’t going to be bring her flowers, that was for sure.

  Because then that would mean I cared, and as much as I knew I cared I didn’t know if I wanted her to know it.

  Fuck.

  Pulling out my phone, I dialed Laura’s number, knowing she was probably up. She didn’t sleep much nowadays.

  “Hello?”

  “Laura, I need a favor.”

  “Jax, when you ask for a favor, it’s never good.”

  I chuckled.

  “I’m going to have one of the guys bring Faye over to your house tomorrow. Can you do one of those girl talks with her?”

  “What are you talking about?” she asked with a laugh. “Are you, Jaxon Morrison… are you telling me that you love this girl?”

  Love? Hell no. That would mean those feelings that could be crushed.

  “Hell, no, but she looks as if she needs a friend, and I just thought I could go sit with Brendan. Give you a break, you know?”

  “That would be nice,” Laura sighed into the phone. “Alright. You can have her come here. I don’t know who she is, but I’m sure we can find some common things to talk about. You must care about her, Jax, no matter what you say.”

  “She will be over there at nine,” I forced out before ending the call.

  Care for Faye? Hell, yes, I cared for her, and that was the fucking problem. Once I found Hector and we called a truce, or killed each other, one or the other, she was going to be on her way home, wherever that was. I would give her money, a car, whatever she needed, but Faye Blackwood wasn’t going to stay here in Paradise.

  Chapter 15

  Faye

  I found myself a bit excited as we turned down the street, glad that I was getting out of the cabin. After two full weeks of staring at the same four walls, it was nice to see that, while cold, the rain had stopped, and I felt like I was rejoining society.

  I had thought about Jaxon’s words last night, how he saw me as nothing more than a prisoner. As much as I hated who I was, I couldn’t change it. Neither did I have a choice on where to go. I had no money, no family left. The rental house was gone, and I had no idea if my car was still sitting in my father’s driveway or not.

  I was alone, completely and utterly alone, and now I had a kid to think about.

  Jaxon pulled into a familiar driveway, and I looked over at him, surprised.

  “Why are we here?”

  He shut off the engine, refusing to meet my eyes.

  “I figured you would want some company. Laura could use a break at the hospital.”

  “Laura as in Brendan’s wife?” I asked. “Does she know who I am?”

  Jaxon let out a breath.

  “No, she doesn’t. It’s not my business to tell everyone. Not anymore.”

  The last shred of hope withered and died in my torn heart. I was still wrestling with the fact that I should tell Jaxon about the baby, scared that he would force me to get rid of it. Neither one of us was in a position to have a child right now, but I secretly did not want to forgo this
chance either. After all this was over, I would leave Paradise and never, ever come back.

  How, I didn’t know yet.

  “Come on,” Jaxon was saying as he opened the truck door. “You will be safe here.”